Love stinks! Well, true love can be kinda awesome, actually. It’s just searching for that special someone that can be not so great, especially when a promising romantic partner turns out to be a gross ogre or total buzzkill. Here, the Zodiacs tell us about the worst date they’ve ever been on! Can you say #relatable?
Uh, yeah. I had the most BORING hookup ever just recently. I’m thinking I’m in for something great, but dude was I wrong! They wouldn’t stop talking. Like, forget hooking up. I couldn’t even get a word in. I sent them packing real quick.
Well, I had been seeing this person for a while, okay. We were pretty close, but not THAT close. They just totally crossed a line. See, we were having this nice romantic dinner for our third or fourth date. And you know what they did?! They tried to reach over and take food off my plate! I was SO done with them from that point on.
I had a date straight outta Hades. An online match, so my hopes hadn’t been too high, but still. First, they showed up thirty minutes late, clearly drunk. Plus, they were totally rude to EVERYONE. Worse yet, my “date” wouldn’t let me leave. I excused myself to the restroom, and the dining staff were kind enough to sneak me out the back.
I’d have to say my most awful date was with someone I had been getting to know. We decided to go for drinks, which was fine. Except they became real creepy, real quick, trying to talk dirty, saying they wanted to get me drunk, and so on. Clearly they were only after one thing, and it wasn’t a committed relationship, let me tell you!
OMG. You totes won’t believe this but it for reals happened. Like, total nightmare. Ugh, I could scream just thinking about it! So, I was out for drinks with this hottie, and I’m dressed to the nines in a new outfit because, like, I’m ME. Things were going fabulously until my date SPILLED THEIR BLOODY MARY ALL OVER ME! Eeeek!!!!
Mouth-breathing, lip-smacking, open-mouth chewing, booger-eating ogre! UGH. I left halfway through the appetizer — for their sake, of course. So I didn’t murder them on the spot. Disgusting.
A cutie asked me to go to a concert with them and I was like YES! OMG, I thought I was in love. When I got there, though, it turned out that the date wasn’t a date… Cutie had brought their S.O. along and I was just a third wheel! It was humiliating.
Yeah, I had this date who started bawling — full-on sobbing, leaking snot, etc. — in the middle of dinner about an EX. I mean, I get being upset over a break up. The thing was, this was, like, ten years prior…
My worst date? Yo, there was this one time I tried to hook up with an online match, y’know? But just as we were getting into it, they were all like, “Do you want kids?” and “What’s your five year plan?” Total mood killer. Bruh, I said on my profile that I was looking for fun. F.U.N.
I’m not one to waste my time, not even when it comes to love. I try to be quite careful when choosing partners, but the love algorithm I use still has some flaws. The worst sort of dates I’ve experienced have been with people who have ZERO motivation for upward mobility. If you don’t have a five year plan, don’t talk to me.
I should start off by saying that I don’t really care about recreational drug use. My motto is “You do you.” However, I was on a date where the person was SO HIGH I literally couldn’t hold a conversation with them. At least, not an intelligent conversation. I’ll never get that time back…
I once went out with this super judgmental person. I mean, I was just starting into my third drink (no biggie, right?) and they had the nerve to ask me if I had an “alcohol problem.” Rude! I didn’t need that kind of negativity in my life, especially not that early in the morning, so I left. I was like, “Way to ruin a breakfast date, pal.”
You’ve gotta kiss a few frogs before you find a prince/princess/royal person, right?
Well, hopefully you haven’t had too many unfortunate dates like these. Even if you have, don’t lose hope. If you want it, you’ll find love in the right sort of person for you. Don’t stop believing!
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